It's just too much, i can't do it, i'm not a journalist, i'm not a detective, i'm not a psychic, there's just way too much stuff out there, and everything has another side.. i think i'm going horizontally, waste of time, out instead of in, but i'm curious, but there's no point, self discovery.. umm.. there's the harmonic concordance / convergence this saturday & a worldwide lunar eclipse, is that dissinformation? False hopes shattered, or true hopes fulfilled? Is anything even real?
Stewart Swerdslow is a con artist? Or is that dissinformation? Montauk isn't real.. or too real? if i knew, would it matter? i can't change it, or am i playing right into the game.. oh man... i need to take some time off...
Is ignorance bliss? what difference does it make to know or to not know? protection? can something you're not aware of harm you? i think so, but what if i can't affect it, whatever doesn't kill us can only make us stronger? Are we an ostrich with it's head in the sand? or an ostrich too smart to add energy to their games.. if thought creates what we focus on, then can it create alternate realities/dimensions if we focus on them? do they exist now? does it matter? Probably not.. but maybe, but maybe not....
Is complacency bad? or good? peace, love and light is unbalanced. Too boring. So we want balance yeah? We? Is there a We? Is it all dependant on me or on the mass, it's both right? I affect the mass.. is there a critical mass? Have we reached it? or are we being told that we have so that we don't? What if the monarchy really are a bunch of evil reptiles? That run the planet? Are movies hints? is "V" real? Why am i even thinking about these things? Why can't i stop? What is the significance of things? Is a little thing such as a ladybug or a rainbow significant? or does it only carry the significance we attach to it? or is it the significane that we can perceive or be aware of at the time that is real? is there a cosmic significance or purpose? why is it that when i get close to something i think is right or comfortable with what i know, something else comes and completely stuffs me up? ...
Maybe my brain is broken... it probably is.. because i always forget everything.
Largest Solar Flare Ever Recorded
04-Nov-2003
A massive solar flare saturated X-ray detectors onboard GOES satellites for 11 minutes. The last time such a thing happened was in 2001. That flare was classified as an X22--the biggest ever. This one was even bigger. It was almost certainly the biggest flare ever recorded. "This solar flare was the largest I have ever seen" said Dr. Ernest Hildner, director of the NOAA/NASA Space Weather Center.
Does that have any significance? That the flare was aimed squarely at earth? (It was)..
"When people choose to experience mental uncertainty, it is a choice they make to allow for their search into other realities. It is not wrong, it is just another possibility. " - Kirael
We had a big rainbow at the front of our house yesterday, it was a complete arc and it was really pretty, my dad came over for a bit, he's going to Cambodia (what's with him and war countries?).
Maybe he'll go to Afghanistan next.
So, we had band prac and we sucked because Stixx doesn't know how sound works or how to use amps and he kept on feedbacking and sounding crap and yelling at me when i tried to fix it, he always wants it so loud, dick, now he can't smoke for 2 months cuz he's getting surgery on his nose because it's crap but i don't reckon he can keep it up, but he'll have to cuz otherwise his face will be stuffed.
I feel really hopeless right now, probably cuz i can't get any answers and i know that even if i did they wouldn't matter, so i'm quitting my job as a truth junkie/addict because i don't think i care at the moment, it's just way too much, way too deep, way too crazy and people are going to start thinking i'm insane if i keep it up. In something completely unrelated : I'm going to go see Hilltop Hoods at the Metro tonite! Sik, Aussie, Rap.
Kylie just sent me a message, it sez :
"STOP READING THE INTERNET PABLO ITS NOT HEALTHY DUDE"
I think i agree..
Ok, so i quit, if i can, i choose to quit, i'm going to start looking up websites about funny chinese signs that don't make sense and nice pictures of cats and stuff. Instead of sites like these..
QUANTUM FORCE HEADQUARTERS
INTELLIGENCE LINKS
{...Founding organizational member of the "METAVERSAL ALLIANCE of SOVEREIGN TIMEWAVES" -- M.A.S.T. ... }
I'm not crazy (that's what crazy people say) i'm just open minded and curious, but what's the point of finding out that there could be divergent timelines in space? What good, does that knowledge serve me? I might as well learn the name of all the X-Men backwards, that would probably have more value anyway!
The truth will set you free, but the search for the truth will completely fuck your brain up.
If i'm already free, do i need truth? how do i know if i'm free? How real is the Matrix? Science has validated and proven that it's real, so what do we do with that knowledge?
I should probably not put this shit up on my blog but i don't care, strength comes with being vulnerable, so here's my prayer..
"God, this is an honest, and fair request : whatever you are, whoever you are, please help me find my own truth and cruise with it... frankly i just want the band to do well and to have a fun life, i'd like to know what's REALLY going on too, but just cuz i'm curious, i'm not liking all these doom and gloom scenarios that i've been reading about, but if they're real then please help me prepare for them, also, i'd like to be in my sweet spot in life, and would appreciate it if you made it blatantly obvious what it is you want me to know if you ever want me to know something.
If you're not real, then please disregard this message. Thanks!.."
Austin & Al don't have any money to cover Stixx's recording, and i don't want to pay it cuz i don't think i'll see that money back, so we're stuffed.
"Stixx has never paid for anything.. not the first recording not the
practices we went to. not fuel to get to the gigs. i cant help at all. stixx
will be the same till the end of time. to make money you need money we have
no money therefore we cant make money." - Austin
It's true.. *Insert big "help me please" sigh in here*.
Send your donations, care of Pablo Murdoch, 16 Melita Street, Cambridge Park, NSW, Australia 2747.
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